Struggling.

Let me tell you (and by ‘you’ I mean the 2 of you who are still reading this): I am STRUGGLING.

In general, I eat well. I cleaned up most of my bad eating habits a few years ago when I decided to make a change with myself and my life. I removed high calorie junk foods, reduced portion sizes, started cooking more, ate more vegetables and whole grains, seriously cut back on snacking, cut out the vast majority of processed foods – and nearly all processed foods containing additives & preservatives (like the dreaded high fructose corn syrup).

I’m still doing great with most of those things.It’s the snacking that’s getting me.

I can’t seem to stop! They’re all healthy snacks, there are just way too many of them. Between the hours of about 3 & 7, I eat.

And eat.

And eat.

And eat.

Each time I eat, I choose a healthy snack, and a reasonable amount of it. But that doesn’t satisfy me. So I pick something else to eat. Still healthy, still a reasonable amount, but another one. And that doesn’t satisfy me, either. So the pattern continues.

Let me give you a specific example: Yesterday, on my way home from a meeting at about 3pm, I ate a granola bar that I happened to still have in my purse from when I was out of town last week. After I got home, I worked until about 5, when I ate a banana, with the teeniest smear of peanut butter and a sprinkling of granola. Fifteen minutes later, I ate the last of some home fries leftover from Sunday’s breakfast. An hour after that, I ate a grapefruit. Not long after that, I had ANOTHER granola bar (different flavor!). Then I went to Kung Fu, so I had a break from food for about 2 hours, at which time I had dinner.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!

Now, granted, yesterday was worse than usual, but this is not a new thing. I know I wasn’t actually hungry for each of those snacks. So what was I doing? Why was I shoving food in my mouth even though I didn’t actually want it?

I was bored. And I like eating. And that’s all that mattered at that point in time.

I thought I had a better handle on the mental aspect of food and had control of my eating habits. I guess I still have some work to do!

I’m certainly not back at the beginning. At least all of my snacks are healthy now!

It’s so very frustrating though. As I scoured the kitchen for my next snack, I thought about how I wasn’t hungry. That I was just bored. And that this is the exact reason that I’ve been bouncing up and down with my weight, losing and gaining the same 5 pounds for months and months on end.

But did that keep me from eating what I wanted to eat? Not even a little.

Think I need therapy?

6 Responses to “Struggling.”

  1. Naomi Says:

    Maybe logging again would help? I know when I am logging I am less likely to eat it if I don’t want to write it down. Honestly those snacks, even in combination didn’t sound that bad. I can txt you at 3:30 with “put that down!” if you’d like. :) seriously though, if there is anything I can do as a supporter to help out let me know! (afterall, I may start asking for a wakeup call at 5 ;) )

  2. Emily Berdell Says:

    What about water? Are you drinking enough? Maybe down a glass of water when you get that urge and then you’ll be too ‘full’ to eat a snack? That helps me sometimes from mindlessly snacking.

  3. Aly12298 Says:

    No therapy! I think a lot of people battle the very same thing. I know I certainly do! I agree though! Drink water! I am just starting with that philosophy again today. I know it’s time for this extra baby fat to go away. I’m just super busy in tax season so it is hard to exercise but I am going to snack better and less myself to try and rid myself of these baby pounds. Good luck! Keep me posted on your success!

  4. Kimberly Says:

    Thanks girls! I appreciate your suggestions, and — possibly even more than that — I take comfort in the knowledge that I’m not alone in the constant battle against mindless snacking! Today has been better: I stayed at my desk until 6pm, rather than sneaking down to the kitchen, and I’ve been very conscious about what I’ve eaten all day — and have only eaten when I was actually hungry. I’m not in bed yet, though, so hopefully I can hang in there the rest of the night.

    One day at a time. One hour at a time.

  5. Jeannielovesfood Says:

    You’re right–you’re not back at square 1! At least your snacks have gotten a lot healthier. And at least you’re AWARE of what you’re putting into your mouth and how you FEEL when you’re putting it into your mouth. And I think the suggestions you’ve received so far are great! *Sigh* You’re not the only one struggling with this issue. Apparently, many in this blogging community do. No therapy needed, I think. You’re not perfect, and no one is. You’re aware of what you’re dealing with here, and you’re working on it. We’re all a work-in-progress. :)

  6. Steph is addicted to Candy! Says:

    Def don’t need Therapy… you are aware of what you are doing and not in denial. I think it is just a hurdle. You have come so far, you will get over this speed bump. Don’t beat yourself up… <3