The Nerves Are Setting In

It’s the eve of my Second Level Black Belt Test. It will encompass things I’ve learned throughout the last four and a half years of training. Weapons. Self defense. Sparring. Open-handed routines. Basics. Etc. Etc.

And I’m nervous.

I felt ready for the test six months ago (there are only Black Belt tests every 6 months at my school), and ironically, now that I’ve had an extra 6 months of practice, I feel a little less confident. Here’s my theory: Because I knew everything pretty well, I started receiving more and more high-level corrections. Little nuances and details that make a big difference.

I got some of these corrections as recently as last night.

Now that there’s so much more to remember – things that I haven’t had long enough for them to be natural yet – I’m concerned that I’ll forget to do them (and I know they’ll be watching for these things in particular), or worse yet, that I’ll be so intent on getting all of these little details right, that I’ll blank on the big things.

I’m not good under performance pressure. At a Kung Fu tournament last year, I completely blanked on one of my routines. I did the best I could to string a bunch of moves together, but it was nothing like what I had been taught and had practiced for months on end. That’s a huge hit to the confidence level.

On top of that, it seems that I’m the only one testing for this belt – out of 5 schools. There was supposed to be one other person from my school, but, sadly, an injury took him out. He’ll join me in 6 months. At least no one will be able to directly compare me to anyone else. On the other hand, I won’t be able to “cheat off” anyone else if I blank on something…

Then, of course, there’s the 10k on Sunday – and I haven’t run all week. I would love to be able to run the entire thing, but if I can’t? I can’t. I’ve been concentrating on Kung Fu this week because, I figure, I can sign up for a 10k any time, but I’ve been building up to tomorrow’s test for almost 5 years… and intensely for 6 months. I’ll be more worried about the 10k tomorrow night, I’m sure.

But for now, I’m worried about my test tomorrow afternoon. I’d love to hear some encouragement, even if you have no idea what my Kung Fu skills are like. That’s right, folks: I’m fishing for empty compliments! Calm these nerves of mine! I’ll pretend they’re all true :)

6 Responses to “The Nerves Are Setting In”

  1. South Beach Steve Says:

    Kimberly, you have nothing to be worried about. You are going to do awesome! And as far as the 10k goes, you are going to rock that thing! You can do it Kimberly! YOU CAN DO IT! Picture me cheering you on as you get ready to test. Woot!

  2. jodiebettcher Says:

    Of course you can do it! Just calm down, take a deep breath and focus. You know this stuff so don't psyche yourself out. Go over all the moves in your head just like you were doing it tonight and you'll be fine tomorrow. Your mother knows these things :)
    Love you and praying for you!
    Mom

  3. Jessica Says:

    You shouldn't worry at all! I've seen you do all these things many times, and you look good doing them. And I can honestly say I've seen you execute your routines and forms with more precision and fluidity in the recent months, and that's because of your hard work. You'll do great … I just wish I could be there to watch you (and possibly spar you).

  4. Kat Says:

    I will be thinking positive thoughts for you tomorrow and sunday. Remember to breathe deeply… Kimberly – look at your weekend. You are an athlete! Have fun and good luck!

  5. bodybypizza Says:

    Can't wait to hear how you did on your test. :) I am sure you rocked it out, but I would probably be crapping if I were the only one going out for this belt, too. That's just how we roll!

    You will do excellent during your 10K as well. The most I had ever run before my first 10K was 5 miles. Being in the crowd will carry you for the last 1.2. It won't be the end of the world if you don't run the whole thing, but I know you can and YOU know you can. You absolutely crushed that Turkey Trot thing. Slow the pace down a bit and you will have it in the bag!! At this point, it's mental over physical. Your body can do it. You just need to convince your mind.

    I jogged a 10K for you today. I was originally going to complete my weekly 5-miler, but once I hit 5, I thought of you and your cluster belt/10K combo this weekend and busted it out. It was great. Thank you for that. :)

  6. bodybypizza Says:

    Can't wait to hear how you did on your test. :) I am sure you rocked it out, but I would probably be crapping if I were the only one going out for this belt, too. That's just how we roll!

    You will do excellent during your 10K as well. The most I had ever run before my first 10K was 5 miles. Being in the crowd will carry you for the last 1.2. It won't be the end of the world if you don't run the whole thing, but I know you can and YOU know you can. You absolutely crushed that Turkey Trot thing. Slow the pace down a bit and you will have it in the bag!! At this point, it's mental over physical. Your body can do it. You just need to convince your mind.

    I jogged a 10K for you today. I was originally going to complete my weekly 5-miler, but once I hit 5, I thought of you and your cluster belt/10K combo this weekend and busted it out. It was great. Thank you for that. :)